For many young people, friendships are built through shared interests, school, college or hobbies. For young carers, friendships can be harder to find.
When you spend your days helping a parent manage chronic pain, supporting a sibling through a medical emergency, handling household responsibilities, or balancing caring with education and work, it can feel like nobody else truly understands your world.
That is why young carer groups are so important.
This summer, a group of young adult carers from Carers Support West Sussex’s My Future groups came together for an activity day at Cobnor Activity Centre. While the day offered a break from caring responsibilities, it also highlighted something equally important: the friendships that grow when young carers meet others who simply “get it”.
Growing up differently
Young carers often take on responsibilities far beyond their years.
Some help with cooking, cleaning and managing medication. Others provide emotional support to family members living with physical health conditions, mental health challenges, autism, anxiety or complex medical needs. Many juggle these responsibilities alongside education, friendships and planning for their future.
As 18-year-old CJ explains, caring can mean growing up faster than your peers.
“All of your peers are going out drinking and that sort of stuff, and you’re just like, ‘Oh well, you get to live your little teenage life and I’m stuck at home.'”
Many young carers describe feeling different from their friends at school or college. While their peers may be focused on social lives and typical teenage experiences, young carers are often thinking about the wellbeing of someone else.
This can have a significant impact on their mental health and wellbeing. Feelings of isolation, stress and anxiety are common, particularly when young carers feel nobody around them fully understands their situation.
The power of being understood
At the Cobnor activity day, one message came through loud and clear: young carers value being with other young carers.
Not because they spend all day discussing their caring roles, but because they don’t have to.
As CJ put it:
“Everybody here has similar issues to you. And you don’t have to talk about it. You just know.”
She described it as:
“A community where you all understand each other without saying a word.”
For many young carers, that shared understanding creates an immediate sense of belonging.
It’s an understanding that goes beyond words. Nobody needs to explain why they might be worried about someone at home. Nobody needs to justify why they cannot always be available. Nobody needs to explain the emotional weight of caring.
Trix, who supports both their mum and younger brother, described it as:
“It’s on another stream of consciousness that connects us.”
This unique bond helps reduce feelings of isolation and reminds young carers that they are not facing these challenges alone
Friendships that make a difference
For the 12 young people who attended the Cobnor event, the day offered more than outdoor activities and fun.
It provided an opportunity to strengthen existing friendships and build new ones with young carers from different groups across West Sussex.
For Rebecca, the value of the day was simple:
“It’s like just a break where I get to see my friends and just have fun without the need to think constantly about caring for my parent.”
For many attendees, these friendships have become a vital source of support.
They provide spaces where young carers can relax, laugh, enjoy themselves and, most importantly, feel understood.
Building confidence and wellbeing
The impact of peer support goes far beyond a single day out.
Young carers repeatedly spoke about how groups like My Future have helped them become more confident, more connected and better able to cope with the challenges they face.
CJ remembers being nervous about attending for the first time.
“When I first joined Young Carers, I was terrified. I wouldn’t talk to a single soul.”
Now, she says:
“It’s helped me come out of my shell so much. I’m so much more confident now.”
Her advice to any young carer considering support?
“Do it. Just do it. Immediately do it. It’s going to be the best choice you ever make in your entire life.”
That confidence comes not only from the activities themselves, but from the friendships formed along the way.
Friendships built on trust.
Friendships built on shared experiences.
Friendships built on an unspoken understanding that can be difficult to find elsewhere.
Supporting young carers across West Sussex
At Carers Support West Sussex, we work closely with West Sussex Young Carers Family Service and other local partners to ensure young carers and young adult carers can access the right support, at the right time, throughout their journey. Together, through activities, peer support, information, advice and one-to-one support, we help young carers balance caring with their own wellbeing, education, friendships and future aspirations.
Because every young carer deserves time to be themselves.
And because sometimes the most valuable support isn’t advice or information.
Sometimes it’s simply finding friends who understand without needing an explanation.
Are you a young carer aged 16-21 living in West Sussex?
Our My Future groups provide opportunities to meet other young carers, make friends, access support and take part in activities throughout the year.
Find out more about support available from Carers Support West Sussex by contacting the young adult carer team.
